3 result(s) for Funny Sonnets About Thoughts On A Train.
These poems are completely original - not copied from anywhere. Feel free to use them however you want.
Mishearing the Platform
The conductor called, "Next stop, Cheltenham Spa,"
but all I heard was "Chilli Ham and Jar,"
and pictured pickled pork in a dish of tar,
squeezed from a tin by some poor station's cook.
I glanced around; the other riders' faces
seemed blank with hunger, or perhaps just bored.
Then "Ruislip" rang out as "Rue Slip," roared
the loudspeaker, and I pictured lace-trimmed slippers
lined up along a shabby, cobbled quay.
When "Mortlake" came, I heard "Mort Lake, Mort Lake,"
and saw a sad lagoon where lost bills drown;
the door slid shut before I'd time to choose
which stop to get off at, so I just snooze.
Rhythm of the Rails
Across the aisle, a stranger starts to snore,
A sawing bass that rattles through the car;
His nose composes tunes I can't ignore,
A lullaby that's sour, loud, and far.
The wheels keep time with every clacking beat,
But he has stolen all the rhythm's art;
I tap my foot to snores that miss their meet,
And wonder if my own may tear apart.
A grandma joins with whistles, sharp and high,
The baby hums in harmony with glee;
The conductor's voice comes crackling from the sky,
And still the snores preside, as proud as can be.
So here I ride, a captive of their song,
The strangest choir that ever sang along.
The Last Stop Punchline
The clock says midnight, and the carriage sways,
A lonely lamp hums over tired heads.
I count the stops, the sleepers, and the stays,
While one loud thought keeps lurching in my bed of thread.
I planned a fine and sensible, quiet night,
But dreams of soup and slippers dance away;
The doors sigh open, and the platform's light
Gives me my cue to ask what I'd say.
So here's the joke: I've wandered every line
To find the one thing sure to make me grin:
The train has ended, and it's my time,
Now I'm the only passenger who's been let in.
The conductor shrugs and hands me my ticket stub:
"Last stop, my friend. You're home. Now mind the hub."
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